Occult Marketing Can't Sell Overpriced Home

Despite low housing inventory, record low interest rates, and a glut of buyers, some Chicago home sellers can't manage to sell their houses. Such sellers are adamant they know what their home is worth, and if a neighbor who clearly had inferior faucets and less exotic hardwood floors could sell his house, then their home is worth the premium. When asked if they might be acting a bit greedy, the owners of the non-selling homes were fairly unanimous in their opinion - they'll save their mortgage payments for a couple of years, let the bank foreclose, rent somewhere nearby, and buy again in two to three years.
Andersonville

Children's Bathroom Sells Home

Parents are tired of exposing their children to marketing devices cloaked inside adorable furry creatures. At least that was the sentiment coming from the buyer of this loft style home, in West Town, who looked at his screen-free kids before proudly blurting, "Now that is what I'm talking about. Sold!"
West Town

Owner Markets Home to Kids Who Love Doors

In an effort to assist homebuyers in seeing past forty-three years of neglect, the owner of this Logan Square Victorian decided she would take a cue from Saturday morning cartoon advertisers and appeal to parents through their children, putting "Behind the Brown Door" on her flyers. The owner is currently debating between two offers, one in the form of a paper airplane, and the other in crayon.
Logan Square

Foreclosures Offer Free Christmas Marketing

In a year end blitzkrieg to clear their already tainted books, major U.S. banks have teamed up with local retailers to offer promotions inside foreclosed properties in a last ditch attempt to lure home buyers into properties that even members of Chicago's vaunted homeless community have derided as "making our here shelters look like da damn Drake."
Albany Park