Couple Loses Baby During Open House

"Have you seen my baby?" These were the frantic words pleaded by a couple at an Open House in Humboldt Park this weekend. The buyers were hoping to get a great deal on a two flat that they could convert into a single family home, but one of the families, who was at risk of losing their affordable apartment, decided that prayer over the little one might engender feelings of empathy from the child's parents. When the child was finally discovered by the distraught couple, they admonished the praying renters by loudly exclaiming, "we were going to give you people a full thirty days notice to vacate and allow you to have our moving boxes too, but not anymore!"
Humboldt Park

Seller Blames Virgin on His Short Sale

A despondent seller of a Bridgeport two flat, and former patron of St. Mary's Church, blamed the misguided advice he received from Mother Mary on the excessive home equity loans he took out on his family's historic compound that have led to his unwanted short sale situation.
BRIDGEPORT

7 Year Itch Affecting Avondale Couple

Finding marriage to be more difficult than previously thought, a local Chicago couple was clearly showing signs of disengagement upon the recent showing of their home. Only the brown paneling seemed to be holding them together, which they both admitted was symbolic of their failed attempts to achieve their renovation dreams.
AVONDALE