It's a Lovely Home - Please Tear it Down

Bucktown once hosted one of Chicago's largest collections of worker's cottages, compact brick A-frame structures that were a precursor to the more well known 'bungalow', both providing an affordable version of the stand alone home so many apartment dwellers craved. Now these endangered monuments to architectural modesty act as charming totems reeling in neighborhood migrants with their "oh, isn't that home cute" looks only to serve as designer landfill for their future 5400 square foot hedge fund cottage, a wall-less box of namaste nastiness.

For those doubtful of the phenomenon, we shall look at the neighborhood's most current cottage to come to market, fully habitable and shown here, with the following listing headline, "Attractive Bucktown Cottage, followed by the captivating: Property has been in same family since 19th century , which was then buttressed with this pithy remark: Prime Bucktown lot for new construction.
Bucktown

Proud Garage Shelters Homeless Rodents

An Edgewater garage, proud to be a member of the famed Balmoral alley, has decided to offset the premature Polar Vortex by allowing neighborhood rodents, vermin and other feral strays to lodge beneath her warm rafters.

When asked about the potential problems that might be caused for the home's sellers, the garage quickly responded, "Look, these buyers today don't care about us. My friends down the alley already warned me. The real estate agent says, 'do you want to see the garage', and they are like, 'no, that's ok. it's just a garage'. Just a garage! Well, I'll show them. Let's see what they think of my little betting parlor here, Rats vs. Cat. Already got a reality tv show calling." Edgewater

Family Lion Prevents Bidding War

Lured by the rarely seen affordable price tag on this Bucktown single family home, several anxious couples packed the home's slightly dated quarters whispering in hushed tones about their plans to tear down, expand, blow-up, re-build and granite out this century old dwelling. Upon exiting the property, each of the buyers told their realtor how much to bid until they were rudely interrupted by the lion guarding the front door, who brusquely told them, "keep walking. you don't want this place." The lion is currently in negotiations to acquire the property.
Bucktown